Saturday, June 30, 2012

Pellatarrum: Giants (part 2)

by Demonic Bunny


The Sundering

The first few centuries after the giants' invasion of Pellatarum were worrysome. The Shapers had observed, studied, made simulations and even conducted what limited live trials they could, but even they could not be certain that their predictions would be correct. The giants had arrived, but there were no signs that they were growing weaker. Then, finally, came the event known as "The Sundering".

The Sky giants had been among the first to arrive on Pellatarum. Of the many kinds of giant they were among the greatest, strongest and the fleetest of foot. Unlike other giant breeds, however, they were also among the most social, living not in scattered clans but in great cities. They alone among had overcome their base instincts and banded together in great communities. This was another form of evolution, as their prior enemies had been the mighty djinn (genies of the air) and their unwilling servants, the dragons.

When the sky giants arrived on Pellatarum they constructed great cities in the air, weaving clouds and magic into fantastic constructions that stretched for miles and forming great floating island-fortresses that dominated the skies. These cities were not just bastions, but also mobile warships from which the giants could descend upon the surface of Pellatarum.

The other giant species were somewhat lesser and later arrivals, but not by much. During these first centuries the elder races of Pellatarum hid themselves well, in the deserts, among the mountain peaks, or deep under earth and ocean surface. They waited, and they hoped.

And then it came, the first sign of the Sundering. It was not a lessening in power that came first, or a loss of the giants' sorcerous powers as the Shapers had predicted. It was a loss of one of their natural abilities.

Gradually, some sky giants began to lose their power to walk among the clouds.

It is uncertain what the sky giants could have done at this point. They still had enormous power at their command, and it was uncertain if the Shapers could have defeated them as things stood. Perhaps if the sky giants had acted promptly they could have marshaled their forces and remained the most powerful race upon Pellatarum. What they did instead was the worst thing possible for the future of their race: they banished their crippled kin from their cities in the skies. The exiles were told that it was the natural progression of things, that giantish adaptability was once again propelling the race onwards, but the true reason was that the sky giants were prideful and saw all non-cloud dwelling races as beneath them. 

As time went on, more and more sky giants began losing their ability to walk among the clouds, with this loss of ability soon followed by a lessening in size and intellect (becoming what are today known as frost giants). Even the other giant races could see that this was not how it was supposed to be, but their numbers were few compared to the sky giants and their sorcerous abilities weaker.

Eventually, the only race oblivious to the lessening of the giant races were those few who still remained in their cold sky cities.. until they too were diminished. These last remaining sky giants did not lose their ability to walk among the clouds; they gradually lost their ability to resist the biting cold. Soon they were shivering in their aerial fortresses, discovering too late that they no longer had the power to make their cities descend to a lower altitude, nor to construct new ones. The cold finally drove them from their fortresses and down into warmer climates among the low and temperate mountains of Pellatarum.

Their arrogance and selfishness had gained them nothing but the unanimous hatred of their kin. Though a few storm giant seers took pity on them and stopped their lessening (as they had done for other giants long before), even today the cloud giants (as they are now known) are shunned and spat upon by their giant kin.

It is uncertain if any of their cities have survived the passing of time, although rumors of  ancient sky-forts still trickle in from beyond the borders of civilization.




(Editor's note:  If you are not imagining an adventure where PCs investigate a creepy abandoned (or is it?) and possibly booby-trapped city of unimaginable magical power, you're doing it wrong. )

Friday, June 29, 2012

Friday Phoning it in

The rest of the week's been a loss, might as well continue the trend. Have some videos.

1.  Holy crap, someone's finally made a Shadowfist/Feng Shui movie!




B) If you like Downton Abby and coarse humor, you will probably enjoy Very Maggie Smith: Sex and Sexuality.




III) From Derek Littlejohn, a Facebook friend of mine:
Dear Women of Pittsburgh,
This does not pertain to all of you, but a good number. It is balls melting hot outside. You have a clutch, a purse, even a mini wallet. I see you carrying it with you. Some are gaudy, some fashionable. If you like it, hey. Good for you.

But I swear on eyepatch of Odin Allfather, the helm of Thor Odinson, the Beard of Zeus and Flames of Hades if you do not use your cash carrying contraption to house your money instead of giving me damp swamp titty money, I'm going to wipe my balls with your change and quarter bukkake you afterwards.

Thank you.

100) On a related note, "Damp Swamp Titty Money" would make an excellent name for a song by Hayley Willis. If you don't know who she is, she performs the song in the Fiat Abarth commercial, and her voice sounds like stanky Louisiana blues poured over smoky mesquite voodoo.




ε)  Hmm. The last three posts have been about breasts. Let's even that up, shall we? Here is Gilbert Gottfried talking about Joan Rivers' vagina. I don't know why it is, but that man can make the crassest jokes sound endearing in that voice of his. 



Have a great weekend, everyone!

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Pretty

Woke up with a headache like a spike stabbing into my eye. Which is always fun.

I'm going to phone this one in and post a nice video. The boys can appreciate the pretty girl and the girls can appreciate the pretty gun, and hopefully both of you can appreciate the amazing speed and fluidity of the shooter.


Wednesday, June 27, 2012

WNW: The Star Wars That I Used to Know

Apparently this is a parody of a video or something. I just like it at face value.

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Rained out

Between the constant rain, my mother being mad at the rain, the sinus headaches as a result of barometric pressure changing because of said rain, I don't have the wherewithal to make a post tonight. I might have something for you tomorrow as I collect my thoughts regarding epithet-hurling harridans who would rather women be perpetual helpless victims instead of  being intelligent, aware humans who understand that safety is primarily the responsibility of the individual.

However, I leave you with this charming thought:

Me: Oh my god, stupid people are infuriating. But you know that.

Oleg: Only live stupid people. The dead kind are ok.

Me: True. Pity we can't reanimate them and make them useful. Necromancy would actually be a "green" technology.

Thank you, and goodnight.

Monday, June 25, 2012

Odds & Sods

  1. The family computer is suspiciously fine. After I posted Wednesday's update, I had to go and do Suzie Homemaker stuff for like an hour. That accomplished (and fully awake now that the caffeine had kicked in) I decided to try to power the computer up just to see where it would fail, i.e. would it make it past the power-on self-test or not. Eerily, it booted up completely fine, with no hint of the earlier problem (a complete freeze, followed by a "BOOT SECTOR NOT FOUND, INSERT BOOT DISK TO CONTINUE" message). I've run all sorts of tests, and there appears to be nothing wrong; all the fans are working, everything is at a good temperature, no viruses or malware. I am at a complete loss as to what happened. Current theory is that the pixies who spin the hard drive were having a coffee break.
  2. "You got me hung, Jack" is one of my favorite ways of saying "Fuck if I know." I'm not surprised that most folks don't get the reference, but you'd think that they'd figure out what it means just from pure context.
  3. Last night I had a dream that I had stumbled upon a cache of various weapons, including such objects of desire as the Kel-Tec KSG and RFB, as well as enough ammo to bathe in. I was running around like Remy the rat in Ratatouille going AHAHAHAHAHAHAH! I was very, very sad when I awoke sans firearms. 
  4. The best hat I ever bought was an "Eh, this'll do" boonie from Wal-Mart. I found it in the men's department near all the typical beer-and-sports teams baseball caps. What's nice about it is that it has an absolutely HUGE brim -- 3.5 inches from the band, which I think is a full inch shorter than most boonies I've seen -- and so not only does it completely cover my face from the sun, it gets most of my shoulders as well. It also makes a fantastic rain hat as well once it's waterproofed; I dosed mine back in '09 and I've only just now had to reapply the waterproofing. Between it, a poncho, and waterproof boots, I can stay dry in pretty much any downpour so long as the wind doesn't drive the rain sideways. 
  5. Or flood. Fortunately for me, I'm on the coast opposite McThag, so by the time it got to us it was just a lot of rain rather than "Where did the car go?"
  6. Weerd Beard has been assimilated into the Herd. That's another notch for my barn door.
  7. There is something incredibly endearing about Gilbert Gottfried telling a filthy joke. One cannot prove this, but it is in the same sense that Mount Everest is, or that Alma Cogan isn't

Goodnight.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

This is not a triumph

Home computer just experienced a total hard drive failure.

Fortunately I have a laptop from which to internet (yes, it's a verb now) and a spare tower with which I can either attempt recovery or convert into the primary unit.

There are 3 of us in this household and only I am serious about backing up data.

Wish me luck...

The Fine Print


This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution- Noncommercial- No Derivative Works 3.0 License.

Creative Commons License


Erin Palette is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com.