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Friday, April 6, 2007

Pax vobiscum

This post touches on Discordianism, but there will be no silliness today. Today is Good Friday and I will show it respect.

I'm honestly not sure if I should write today, because I feel burdened to write something about my beliefs, yet I also have no desire to make the beliefs of others seem trivial. So if I cause offense, dear ones, please forgive me, as it's certainly not intended.

I grew up in a Protestant Christian household. Every day, at breakfast, my mother would read aloud a passage from the Bible, followed by a mini-essay from a daily devotional. I think the Bible is a rich source of history, case studies in ethics, and literary symbolism. For the better part of a year I studied the Book of Revelations just because it contains some of the most potent written imagery I have ever experienced.

I am deeply shamed by all the sin and crimes that are committed daily in Jesus' name, but I am also aware that these are the results of human baggage and selective interpretation of the scripture. I believe that Christ's teachings are universal. Love, acceptance, tolerance, forgiveness, piety, charity; the world would be a better place if we all practiced these things, whatever our religions might be.

I believe in Christian values...

... but I don't know if I have faith any more.

Is it possible to be a Christian without believing in God? To practice the morality without the faith? Is there such a thing as a Deistic Christian Philosopher?

I'm so horribly tempted to end this with a "Hail Eris," but that would be flippant and sacrilegious. It would, however, perfectly illustrate my current confused emotional state. A philosopher, you see, can entertain two or more different philosophies in her head. But religions tend to be exclusive things.

I love Christianity. But I don't think I can have faith in it any more. It's become a philosophy to me. Discordianism is a philosophy, too, but it's something that I can have faith in... I'm just not sure if I should.

I'm not sure what I believe,
So I believe I'll have a drink.