Wednesday, January 30, 2008

WNW: The Gothpel

It may not be readily apparent, but Christianity can be incredibly goth. After all:
  1. Its chief symbol is an instrument of torture.
  2. The Sacrament of Communion is ritualized, symbolic Theophagy.
  3. Priests and Nuns wear black and white. That is old school goth, baby.
  4. Speaking of colors, look at the colors of the church year: Dark Blue. Red. Purple. Black.
  5. In fact, the entire season of Lent is one big ol' goth party. It starts with people wearing ash on their foreheads and ends with the death of God.
  6. The entire first half of the Book of Revelations is basically about all the cool people being feared, misunderstood and oppressed by The Man because of their religion, followed by persecution and death. But that's okay, because not long after that, all those people in power die hideously, and are tormented forever.
  7. This is the religion that invented self-flagellation... because cutting is for poseurs.
Seriously, if there isn't a "Goths for Christ" movement, someone should start one. You can practically perform the Mass to E Nomine's Das Testament already.

Now playing: E Nomine - Vater Unser
via FoxyTunes


  1. Now hang on just one clove-picking minute there.

    As an athiest and part-time goth, I object to the conflation of these two cults. Please keep your petty religious machinations out of my perfectly austere goth scene, 'KThxBye.

  2. christianity is so goth...said the girl who identifies with both

  3. Dear Jesus,

    We goths promise to stay out of your churches if you promise to stay out of our scene, and if you could tell your followers the same, that would be swell.

    Thanks awfully!

    The goth gang


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