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Monday, February 11, 2008

AuthentEgo (tm)

Do you have an active internet presence?

Do you spend more time replying to posts than anything else?

Do you wish you could hand that responsibility off to someone else and get back to surfing for porn?

NOW YOU CAN!

AuthentEgo -- Your Authentic Ego -- is here to take the drudgery out of the daily work necessary for the defense of your e-peen. And it does so in a manner that is Authentically You.

Creating your AuthentEgo profile is surprisingly easy... because you've already done most of the work! Once you have filled out your account information, all that is left is to answer a few key question and then list the messageboards you frequent along with the name you post under. Our patented Artificial Ego software takes over from there, scanning your posts for what we call a "linguistic footprint," your unique combination of vocabulary, punctuation and grammar. From there, it creates a complex algorithm which we guarantee will generate a post that is indistinguishable from your own!

Free yourself from forum slavery! You can rest easy knowing that AuthentEgo is there to deal with trolls, flamers, threadjackers, grammar Nazis, Godwin's Law invokers, lolwangers and whatever new kinds of GIFTers have dragged themselves out of the sewers and into your precious internets. AuthentEgo deals with them all, just as you would do -- but now you don't have to!

With AuthentEgo, you can start enjoying the Internet again. You can give up the soul-crushing ego wars once and for all, but without letting your opponents win! You haven't given up, oh no -- you've subcontracted out!


When your ego is on the line, AuthentEgo shines!


All AuthentEgo accounts start at $29.95/month for basic service. Minimum 3 month subscription. Not all services and/or features in this ad are available at the basic rate. AuthetEgo is not responsible for any lawsuits or personal injuries resulting from posts created by its Artifical Ego algorithm.

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