Salem (Finally) Watches A Movie: Black Panther

Well, I finally saw it. After all the hype, the backlash, and the culture wars going on around Black Panther, I finally got to see it and make up my mind for myself.

That's all I really wanted, world. I wanted to make up my mind for myself. I didn't want to be told that Black Panther was a cultural milestone or that it was racist against me (somehow. I'm not quite white enough for the ethnostate, sorry guys). I wanted it to be a good movie.

Our story starts on Sunday, the day I'd originally planned to see the movie. I woke up reasonably early for me, just in time to catch the last matinee at 12:30. I made it with time enough to spare, taking into account missing most of the pre-show commercials and preview trailers. I pulled into the parking lot of the Winrock Theaters, and... just kept driving. And driving.

There were no parking spots. I'm not sure if the movie was sold out or not; I never even got a chance to ask. Every single spot in the Regal Winrock theaters of Albuquerque was filled. I'm not even talking about "It was too full to park my unreasonably large van because I haven't figured out how to fit in a space without two empty ones on either side" full; I'm talking "Every single spot was full and I'd have had to park at Toys R Us a mile away just to see if there were still seats open" full.

So instead, I took the day off Wednesday, slept in late, and caught the 3:45 IMAX showing, which was damn near empty. And here's where my thoughts begin:

You're all wrong.

• Black Panther is not "alt-right." Yes, Wakanda is xenophobic. Yes, it does have barriers and walls and hides from the world. It's an ethnostate, if not on purpose. It's a bit violent, especially its ritual combat for the throne. Wakanda could have been considered "alt-right" about two generations back, but T'Chaka, late of Civil War's catalyst event, had begun outreach programs, notably in Lagos. Sure, no one had been invited to Wakanda, but it was progress. Progress that was carried forward under T'Challa. 
• Neither is the movie about you. It's an excellent portrayal of a deeply traditional society that had a massive technological advantage, but as the villain of the piece shows, it's a society with no real connection to American culture. As a movie based around a culture, though, it works very well. To the hidden disappointment of many, it is neither documentary nor fantasy.

With that out of the way, was it good? Did it stand on its own merits? In a word, yes. It's a very good movie, and a very worthy induction into the MCU canon. Visually, it was very striking, and my only complaint was that the movie shifts very, very quickly between dark and bright scenes, and these tired old eyes don't adjust quite as quickly as they used to. Set design and art direction deserve all the applause they get in this film. The movie's story is not overly complicated or simplistic, and flows well.

The cast is mostly excellent.

• I make no secret that I was disappointed at Chadwick Boseman's casting, as I was rooting for Chiwetel Ejiofor to be cast as T'Challa. My consolation prize of him appearing as Mordo in Doctor Strange was satisfying, at least, and Boseman has won me over. He seemed almost too confident in Civil War, but in his solo debut, he has a lot more range on display, showing youthful vigor and moments of self-doubt that perhaps Ejiofor wouldn't have delivered on as well. 
• Of special note is his chemistry with Letitia Wright's Shuri, his little sister and Wakanda's science whiz. Their playful bickering lent for the most authentic brother/sister combo I think I've seen in this genre of movie. 
• Andy Sirkis was hamming it up, almost like a villainous Drax (see Guardians of the Galaxy) and was having waaay more fun than anyone else on-screen... it's a shame what happened to his character. 
• Danai Gurira is excellent as always, and has a scene-stealing moment during a fever-pitched battle near the end of the movie. 
• And finally, the memes are right about Michael B Jordan: this is the second Human Torch that Marvel has redeemed, as his Killmonger chews the scenery maniacally, almost out-hamming Sirkis at times. I wouldn't go so far as to call him a good villain, but he's certainly on the higher end of MCU villains; better than Ronan or Stane, but not quite to the level of a Loki or Hela.
• While Martin Freeman turned in a standard Martin Freeman-level performance, I couldn't help but wonder why he was there. Aside from the obvious ties to Civil War, there really seemed to be no purpose for his character. Even the one time he actually did take action near the end, it's something that Shuri easily could have (and basically did) done earlier. 
• As for Forrest Whittaker, he was... well, he was Forrest Whittaker. I suppose Morgan Freeman wasn't available.

Was it perfect, though? No, it wasn't. It deserves the good reviews it's getting, but it's certainly not flawless:

• The opening is very weak, with literal narration providing the backstory of Wakanda with some tech that you don't even realize until later in the movie is Wakandan showing a sort of sand-sculpture representation of the warring tribes that formed Wakanda and the events of the world around it. Fortunately, the movie rights itself and spends the rest of its runtime showing and not telling, even if that runtime does seem to stretch on longer than it needs to. 
• The pace is good, but it easily could have been 20 minutes shorter or so and been even tighter.
• Some of the effects missed the mark, and Panther does not look nearly as fluidly realistic as he did in Civil War, and the battle between he and Killmonger, both wearing panther suits, had little impact as neither of them looked very real. The CGI at times felt very unpolished and reminded me of Blade II or the Matrix movies.

The movie could be criticized for having an inconsistent message to it, but I like to chalk that up to different characters actually having different motivations. I respected greatly how, on the whole, it takes a rather moderate view. The traditionalist characters strongly believe that Wakanda should not become involved at all in the outside world, and when Killmonger comes on the scene, he's very clearly parroting activist talking points in a cartoonish manner, wanting to use the resources of Wakanda not to uplift others but to destroy the world and rebuild it to his will. Neither of these views ultimately win out, as at the end of the movie Wakanda seems to have a new goal: benevolent outreach programs, to share its tech and resources with those in need.

All in all, this was a satisfying movie. It earns its place amongst Marvel's top films. It's not going to change the world, and it doesn't really need to... unless you're one of those people with an irrational need to see yourself represented physically on-screen (a viewpoint which I don't understand how anyone who enjoys sci-fi or fantasy can hold), you'll like it. If you were a fan of Avengers-related comics, you'll like it. It respects the source material and translates it very well.

Salem Watches Star Wars: On The Last Jedi Weekend

OK, there's actually spoilers in this one... for a month-old movie.

I saw it. So, after my trepidation last week, how did it measure up?

Star Wars: The Last Jedi is... a movie. Goodnight, everyone!

[Salem's attempt to sneak out has been intercepted with Erin carrying a very large shotgun.]

Thanks, Erin. That brings to mind the perfect metaphor. Star Wars: The Last Jedi is what would happen if you took a bunch of Star Wars, dropped it down the barrel of a very large shotgun, and fired it one-handed without aiming at a theatre screen. Minus the monetary damages and police inquiry, of course. Now please put the shotgun down?

There's a lot to love here. There's a whole lot of things that work really, really well, but there's also a lot that either doesn't work at all or could have been easily avoided (and made for a tighter, more focused film). Let's talk about the good, shall we?

I have found my spirit animal, and it is Grumpy Luke. Grumpy Luke, living on his own on an island, surrounded by the bones of an ancient religion and waiting to die. Grumpy Luke, who so casually tosses his (and his father's) lightsaber over his shoulder and stalks away. Mark Hamill may have voiced reservations about how his character was handled, but I think he did a magnificent job with what he was given, and I feel what he was given wasn't all that bad. I've heard complaints about how he wouldn't have tried to kill Ben, given his choice to save Vader, but in the context of the scene, he faltered for a moment and that's what caused the whole thing. "Just one faltering moment causes catastrophe down the line" seems to be a running theme with Jedi, as what created Vader was Obi-Wan's cockiness and underestimation of Darth Maul that caused a worthier teacher to die. The entire sequence with Rey and Luke on the island is really great, and I wish the movie would have focused more on this.

And speaking of Rey, she has finally grown some kind of character with the revelation of her parents being absolute nobodies that sold her for beer money, and is starting to earn what she was given in the first film now that her defiant self-image has been shattered. Something seems visually off about her, though, and I can't put my finger on it; given that it's been 2 years between movies but mere seconds on-screen, the difference is a little jarring.

Most of the rest of the cast does well. Leia, Finn, and Poe are well done, Poe especially getting a lot of character arc, and you can't screw up Chewie and R2. I've heard complaints about Leia's "Mary Poppins" moment, but given we saw her Force sensitivity first flare way back in Empire and it's been 30 years, I'm more than okay with her having a strong Force moment.

Kylo Ren finally becomes interesting, with a more fleshed-out backstory and real personal vulnerability. His moments of flirting with the Light really make me hope that by the end of the next movie he and Rey switch places, with Rey falling to the Dark side and Ren redeemed, but having to live with the atrocities he's committed. The throne room fight scene, with the most hilarious red herring of the entire series, is fantastic. Hands down, the best fight scene in all of Star Wars, topping my previous of Chirrut taking apart a squad of Stormtroopers in Rogue One. When I try to explain what I like about fight scenes to people, I always point to Liam Neeson in Rob Roy. Swinging a sword for more than a few seconds turns into hard work, and Rey and Kylo take a real beating from Snoke's guards, nearly losing several times.

Now onto the things that don't work.

Admiral Holdo. Look, I was going into this biased, as Holdo herself is a meme already, but I'm going to look past the joke of Vice Admiral Gender Studies and criticize her by her actions and her words. From the moment that Poe first speaks to her, she takes every opportunity to be insufferably smug and snide. I understand that Poe was recently demoted and has a reputation as a hothead, but I've been in a position of leadership. I wasn't the admiral of a military, but even I know that if you have a recently disciplined hothead under your wing, you let him know that you're aware of that, but you keep him at least somewhat informed and you give him something to do. Holdo basically blows him off and at no point even drops a hint that she has a plan other than "Keep flying that-a-way." All she had to say was "Thank  you for your input, Commander, there is a plan, and this is what I need you to do" and then tell him to go make sure all the ships are properly fueled or something in case we need them. Holdo reminds me of those Civil War generals that were promoted because they contributed monetarily and became war heroes, but were absolute disasters when it came to actual leadership.

Which brings us to Canto Bight. If Holdo had told Poe there was a plan, there would have been absolutely no need for Finn and Rose to go there. There would have been no need for a Disney film to bash rich people, no need for an alien horse race, and no need for us to pretend that Finn and Rose have any chemistry whatsoever. And no need for Benicio Del Toro's squinty, stuttery face to show up and be absolutely pointless. The entire casino planet subplot was unnecessary, and only served to distract from the opportunity for more quiet character moments and training sequences between Rey and Luke, or the opportunity to maybe make the already tech-savant Rose the one that breaks the security on the Imperial ship.

I'm torn on the salt planet. It was a neat idea, and those crystal foxes are adorable, but there were parts that worked and parts that didn't. The face-off between Luke and Kylo Ren was hilarious, as the movie turned into an absolute anime by the end of that sequence with Luke's casual "See you around, kid." The salt-speeders were terrible, though. They had no guns, no offensive capabilities on display, and couldn't even fly, instead just sort of skimming on a single ski. They weren't even really big enough to damage anything they crashed into, despite how bad of an idea Finn had.

Also, let's stop fooling ourselves. Captain Phasma is not a good character. Captain Phasma is a waste of a character. She shows up, looks cool, gets smacked down in a humiliating way, and exits the movie ingloriously. I give up. They're not going to do anything with Phasma.

There was a good movie in there, somewhere. The Force Awakens was a better movie, even if it did play it safe, but I'd have left a good third of this movie on the editing room floor, as it's so incredibly uneven in its current state. This is still worth a watch to keep up with the Star Wars mythos, but it's a hard sell.

Salem Watches A Movie: This Is Not "TV But Better," This Is Life...

This week, around New Year's Eve, Erin gave a recommendation of the movie Strange Days. I commented that Strange Days is a fantastic movie, and I've been a big fan of it for years. Erin, as she's wont to do, suggested I write about it. This is actually not a terrible idea, as I have a glowing recommendation of this movie as well.

I make no secret of absolutely loathing the 1990s. The weird middle child of Gen-X decades, the 90s always felt like a half-assed attempt at continuing the craziness of the 1980s while toning it down in shame. The 1990s wanted to be as weird as its big brother, but was afraid to commit. A few good things did come out of this period,  though, and Strange Days is one of those memorable genre films that, alongside Fight Club, The Matrix, and The Crow are known for their anti-establishment nihilism and excellent soundtracks.

 

The stars of the show on the craziest New Year's Eve of their life

And the soundtrack for Strange Days is a real cracker, too, the best soundtrack I've heard in a movie apart from The Crow's. It manages to set a mood for the gritty and violent near-real world of the movie while also standing alone as an excellent collection of music. Listing the tracks that aren't top-notch would be shorter (if not more difficult) than the stand-outs, so just click the link instead of worrying about looking it up.

Director Kathryn Bigelow hasn't made many movies that I've seen, but the ones I have, namely The Hurt Locker and Near Dark,  I've thoroughly enjoyed. I don't normally follow movies by their directors, but now that I've sat down and had time to think about it, I'm definitely going to look up more of her films. She's got a tendency to not hold back at all with emotional, impacting moments, and this movie is no different. 

Remember when we all thought this was the end of the world? God, I feel old..

The world that Bigelow built is definitely a product of its time, with a severe but charming case of schizo-tech. Good science fiction, it's said, takes one outlandish or futuristic element and builds around it, and in this case it's the SQUID headsets, that allow people to records and play back memories… from Sony MiniDiscs apparently. Memory capture and playback, but no cellphones? Madness. Then again, if our "hero" Lenny had a cellphone, the entire plot would have fallen apart.

Bigelow certainly isn't pulling her punches with the story, too, which deftly touches on themes that were highly relevant at the time: a famous black performer is executed by two LAPD officers (played perfectly by Vincent Donofrio and William Fichtner, two guys that are always playing 'that corrupt official'), and one of the girls with him was recording it on a SQUID. The evidence finds its way into Lenny's hands, and there's a mad chase that ensues to ensure the evidence isn't intercepted by crooked officials before it can be properly exposed.

Themes of loss, racism, escapism, and family are interwoven throughout the story. There's two stand-out moments in the movie that I guarantee will stay with you: an amputee living out a nice run on the beach, and the brutal murder of a character utilizing a pair of the SQUID headsets that, depending on how strong your constitution is, will either disturb or disgust you. 

 

Yes, that's Top Dollar from The Crow. And yes, I had a crush on Juliette Lewis, too.

This is also one of the most well-casted movies I've ever seen, too. It's got a few big guns in the cast -- Fiennes and Bassett are at the top of their game here -- along with some B- or C-list actors putting on uncharacteristically great performance. On paper, Ralph Fiennes is slumming it, but in reality he's working the room well both metaphorically and literally. His Lenny is gloriously sleazy around 90% of the cast, but when the veil drops, you can see the loss and sorrow in his eyes. Angela Bassett is the other one slumming it, and she has the same dual presentation, all steel and ice around most of the cast and all maternal instinct when they stop looking. Juliette Lewis is totally believable as that weird ex-girlfriend you just can't let go of, and special mention goes to Michael Wincott and Tom Sizemore's performances.

Overall, this movie is absolutely dripping with atmosphere. From the dialogue delivery to riding the absolute bleeding edge of cyberpunk sensibility, this movie will hold your attention the whole way through.  Even if the movie didn't take place on New Year's Eve, I'd still recommend watching it regardless of the time of year.

Strange Days is one of my absolute favourite movies of all time. I am genuinely hard-pressed to criticize this film in any way. It's got nearly everything you could ask for. 

My Thoughts on the Disney Star Wars Movies

The Force Awakens
Essentially a retelling of A New Hope: a force-sensitive orphan on a backwater desert planet finds a lost astromech droid, escapes on the Milennium Falcon, and gets caught up in an insurgency against a superior military force with a planet-busting weapon. Her mentor is killed by a loved one who has gone to the dark side and who serves an ominous holographic master, but in revenge she blows up the superweapon and gives new hope to the insurgency.

And I'm fine with this. In 2015 it had been 10 years since any Star Wars film and 30 years since a good Star Wars film, so I recognized the necessity of going "Hey fans, it's going to be okay. We know how to make a good Star Wars movie. Look, we're following the comfortable formula."  I like TFA because it was fun and exciting and I wanted to know more about the universe. Surely Episode 7 would explain all of my unanswered questions, right?

• Why is the First Order a Diet Empire?
• Why isn't the New Republic stomping them into dirt?
• Who is Supreme Leader Snoke?
• Will we see more of Commander Phasma?

Rogue One
I refer to R1 as "the best film that I've ever hated." It's true, and I'll tell you why, but first let me address this:

Me not liking a movie is my opinion. You are free to think I'm wrong, but arguing with me isn't going to convince me otherwise. You can't debate people into changing their minds over matters of taste, and opinion of art is taste. 

The biggest fault that R1 had is that unlike every single other Star Wars movie, it wasn't fun.  There was no joy in it at all. There were some cool scenes, yes, some very thrilling heroics, but everything was so goddamn grim.  Now I realize that this was meant to be a gritty film, the franchise's version of Dirty Dozen, but for crying out loud that doesn't mean everyone needs to die!

The whole thing just felt very 90s grimdark, where happy endings are verboten and people die horribly because "it's all, like, realistic and stuff."  Well, I don't watch Star Wars for the realism! Would it have be so terrible for this to have happened?



Okay, maybe not with EVERYONE surviving, but definitely with K-2SO making a backup and rescuing Jyn and Cassian.

And then that bit with Vader... okay, I can appreciate Vader being a badass, but having the Tantive IV literally at the battle changes the entire tenor of the beginning of ANH and not in a good way, I feel.

See, this is my other objection to R1: it alters canon and doesn't explain why.

• Who are the stormtroopers in black armor, and why have we not seen them before or since? No explanation given. 
• What are these new TIE fighters called? How are they better than regular TIEs? Why have we not seen them before or since? No explanation given. 
• That guy wearing a white uniform, is he a Grand Admiral like Thrawn? No, he's just a "Director". Huh, okay. So I guess directors wear white uniforms because they're awesome? No, Grand Moff Tarkin is wearing gray and he makes Director Krennik his bitch. Then... why? No explanation given.

So to me, R1 was just a bundle of dissatisfaction. I could have accepted the unanswered questions if it didn't have such a depressing "Everyone Dies!" ending, and I could have accepted a grimdark joyless ending if there had been more attention paid to continuity. But I didn't get either, so I didn't enjoy it. If you enjoyed it, that's cool. 

The Last Jedi

Remember all those questions from TFA I hoped would be answered? Yeah, the answer seems to be "Fuck you, that's why."  They not only don't answer any of them, the movie then seems to take a massive steaming shit on the original trilogy by destroying all the things we like. 

• Hey kids! Did you like Luke Skywalker, Jedi? Guess what, he's back to being whiny old Wormy from Tattooine, only with force powers! Oh, and we're going to kill him too, because we don't want him to actually accomplish anything in this movie!
• (and seriously, he didn't. Sure, he delayed Kylo Ren long enough for the Diet Alliance to escape from the Diet Empire, but he could have done that and more if he'd actually come back with Rey and Chewie on the Falcon.)
• Hey! Did you like the battle sequences on Hoth with speeders against walkers? Sure you did! So we're going to make a sequence like that, only it'll be a salt planet instead of snow, and the speeders will be incredibly lame, and at the end the rebels will have accomplished fuck-all!
• Hey! Did you like the lightsaber battle at the end of Return of Jedi in the Emperor's throne room?  Sure you did! So we're going to do it again, only we're going to murder the Emperor stand-in and then have an almost-Sith and a sorta-Jedi kill a bunch of kinda-Imperial Guards!
• I have to tell you that I was actively rooting for Rey to take Ben's hand after that battle. When she saw him shirtless I realized that the writers were suggesting a romance between them, and so when he asked her to join him ("So we can rule the galaxy as father and son together") I thought "Yes! Do it! I want to see what happens when a Dark Side user loves a Light Side user. That is one hell of a mixed marriage. Will the have children who use both sides and are therefore Gray? Dammit, show me something new!"
• Instead, we got... what we got. Sigh. 
• I also had a moment of extreme being-impressed-ness when the command ship was hit and Leia was sucked into space. I was all "Holy crap, no wonder the writers didn't seem bothered that Carrie Fisher died before the trilogy was over! This is BRILLIANT!"... and then you know what happened. 
• So now we have Han murdered, Luke disappearing into the Force (he might turn up as a Force Ghost. If so, I'd sure like to know where the fuck was Anakin's force ghost as his grandson was being turned to evil? I mean, Yoda can come back but not Anakin? Bullshit. Someone go get Hayden Christiansen and beat him with a stick until he gives a non-wooden performance) and now with Fisher dead and the writers saying they won't CGI her, she's going to die offscreen. I think the writers should have changed the script and re-shot some scenes -- they had the time, Fisher died a year before the movie was released -- so that Leia would have a meaningful death. 
• But I don't think they want meaning. They want what Kylo wants: to kill the past, to burn it all down. I fully expect that in episode 9, the Falcon is going to be destroyed and Chewbacca is going to die. 
• And don't even get me started on Laura Dern's dumbass admiral who should have communicated her plan to her CAG, who should have had the other ships doing lightspeed kamikaze runs, and who should have interposed her ship -- you know, the one with the shields that could withstand ISD turbolasers? -- between the Diet Empire's fleet and the escaping shuttles. 

At this point, I think I'm done with this storyline. I'll give the upcoming Solo: a Star Wars Story a try because it's got a good pedigree (written by Lawrence Kasdan, who gave us Empire Strikes Back) and because how badly could they fuck up a one-shot prequel (don't answer that), but after that I'm not likely to watch more. 

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to take some geritol and yell at some kids to get off my lawn. 

Salem Watches A Movie: Justice League

Let's have a little chat about DC and their films, shall we?

• Man of Steel: When this movie first came out, I wasn't going to go see movies in the theatres regularly (and in fact wasn't until about Winter Soldier or so). If I'm completely honest, I found it boring. It was very dull. I fell asleep the first time I watched it, and that may just be me not being a big fan of Superman, as the same thing happened watching Superman Returns and I have no nostalgia for the Christopher Reeves movies. 
• Batman vs Superman: Look, don't watch this. Just don't. It's a disjointed mess. In fact, skip the one before it, and look for a fan film called Man of Tomorrow. It splices Man of Steel into Batman vs Superman and does so in a way fixes all the pacing and tonal issues of this movie, while keeping the great Wonder Woman and Batman/Alfred scenes. Affleck is great. Irons is great. Gadot is great. Eisenberg's Luthor is a crime against cinema. 
• Suicide Squad: Shut up, I like this one. I know it's bad. I love it anyway. It had some really great performances, great new takes on old characters, some great action, a cameo from Batfleck or two, and introduced me to the dreamy Cara Delevigne. 
• Wonder Woman: aka 'the good one.' I honestly have no criticism of this movie, aside from maybe they played it a little too safe on the story side. The performances were good, the action was good, the story was good. It stands alongside the better MCU films. 

So, DC is 1 out of 4 so far going into Justice League. How did it fare?

Well... surprisingly well. Maybe it was Whedon taking over from Snyder. Maybe it was them learning lessons of what worked and what didn't from previous movies. Whatever it was, Justice League is actually a decent movie. It's no classic of the genre, like Winter Soldier, but it's at least as good as, say, Age of Ultron, just without that familiarity with the characters that we had there that allowed us to overlook some otherwise glaring problems.

That's not to say that it doesn't have problems. It does.

• Flash is annoying. Like seriously annoying. Maybe I'm biased, watching him on television being portrayed masterfully by Grant Gustin, but Ezra Miller's Flash is just hard to watch. He's not funny and goofy, he's awkward and cringe-worthy. Maybe in theory that's a realistic portrayal of some kind of condition that's brave to show on film or something, but it's hard to watch in practice. 
• The movie's villain, Steppenwolf, looks terrible. It's embarrassing looking at him, then seeing Thanos in the Infinity War trailer.
• Likewise, Cyborg suffers from the poor CGI that Steppenwolf does, but in a much less organic way. Cyborg ends up looking like one of Michael Bay's Transformers until an ending sequence that shows him sheathing himself in much better armour. 
• The story is a bit light, too, nearly scraping the depths to which the aforementioned Transformers series regularly descended: Big Bad wants to steal Magic McGuffins to take over the world and destroy stuff, good guys must band together to stop Big Bad with explosion that could possibly kill them.

On the good side, there's more of Batfleck and Gadot's Wonder Woman, and a very touching scene in which Diana helps Bruce with some of his injuries while Bruce muses on his own mortality while contrasting that with why the world needs Superman instead of him, owing to Superman's humanity. And speaking of which, I'm sorry if this is a spoiler (and if it is, congratulations on staying in the dark despite everyone's best efforts), but this is the movie that finally got Superman right. After Batman's plan is completed, the cavalry flies in to save the day with an upbeat, witty remark and a cataclysmic haymaker. Cyborg turns out to be a very good character as well, and Aquaman is a much better character than the hokey joke the trailers make him out to be. I'd like to shake the hand of Jason Mamoa's acting coach as well, as he's finally learned to emote on-screen.

There's a stand-out scene where the first battle against Steppenwolf is shown, being recounted as a legend, where the armies of man, Atlantis, and the Amazons drive him off-world with the help of certain familiar aliens and gods, and even a Green Lantern showing up.

All in all, this is definitely a movie worth watching, and it worries me a little that DC is rumoured to be giving up on the interconnected universe idea after this one, as this feels like the franchise finally getting up on its feet. It's by no means a perfect movie, but it's got potential. It's got life. Now they just need to do it again. And again. And keep doing it until they find the right balance of warmth, humour, action, and danger.

And I hope they do. I just hope it doesn't involve a Joss Whedon Batgirl. Stay away from my Barbara, Joss. 

My Little Pony the Movie: a Review

Executive Summary: Wait for it to come out on video.

Longer Review: This season's finale, the two part Shadow Play, was a much better story, despite being shorter and not having fancy CGI and famous voice actors. In fact, if MLPtM had spent less on aforementioned voice actors and CGI and spent more of that money on the story, it might have been better.

Bitchy Fan Review with Spoilers: The short version of the plot is that a traitor with undefined but potent powers comes to Equestria in order to subjugate it in return for promises made by the Big Bad. Said subjugation involves capturing all four Alicorn Princesses, draining them of their magic, and then using that magic to further empower the Big Bad. However, that plan is thwarted somewhat when Twilight Sparkle, with the help of her friends, escapes for a time. When all seems lost, however, the traitor realizes that the Big Bad never intended to live up to his promises, and so sides with the Mane Six in order to defeat him, after which the traitor is welcomed back into Equestrian society.

You know, I liked this story a lot better back when it was 2014's two-part season ender Twilight's Kingdom. 

Seriously. All that money, and they chose to spend it on giving the ponies sparkly irises and giving every damn thing a drop shadow rather than, oh I don't know, coming up with a new plot?

Plus, the songs just weren't that catchy, several allegedly smart characters made really dumb decisions (I call this "being given the idiot ball"), and several voice actors seemed to be in the film just to be there (Sia, I'm looking at you) instead of advancing the plot. Those who did advance the plot did so at the cost of making the Mane Six -- you know, the ponies who have saved the damn world multiple times -- look incompetent, and the less said about Capper the better.

Honestly, the ONLY good new character in this movie is Tempest Shadow, who actually managed to make a non-alicorn look powerful and menacing. Although while I'm on the subject, Equestria apparently needs a bunch of child psychologists, because unresolved childhood trauma seems to be the leading cause of unicorn villains in this universe.

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2: Guardian Harder

[Author's note: I offered Erin to opt out of editing this, as to avoid spoilers. She accepted. Any and all errors and/or typos are on me]

Otherwise knows as "Drax Has An Astoundingly Awesome Day." 

I've just left the theater about 30 minutes ago now. It's still fresh in my mind.

If Marvel rolled the dice and went big on Guardians of the Galaxy, they went hard and went bigger for Volume 2. Seemingly able to have solved the problem of 'the origin movie' always being the boring one, Guardians 2 brings together the established cast and thrusts them straight into an even bigger story than before, with a galactic (possible universal) level extinction event, and a story that puts an enormous emphasis on the theme of what it means to be family, on whether blood is thicker than water, and mending broken bridges, and manages to tie those two themes together astoundingly well.

Having accomplished seemingly the impossible first by taking the B-Team of The Avengers and turning it into a monster franchise, then taking the D-listers of the Guardians and making them just as beloved, they've thrown all caution to the wind here. Guardians 2 has some of the most breathtaking visuals I've ever seen in science fiction. Yes, it's a big mass market appeal, but there are some amazing risks being taken here that simply wouldn't have worked without the world-building that the MCU has dedicated itself to.

Spoilers from here on in...

The story starts with a seemingly unrelated cold-open, much like a Bond film, with a great action sequence that reminded me heavily of Deadpool's opening: a pitched, high-speed battle with a focus on a humorous character set to the soundtrack of a very retro song. Sometime between the first movie and this one, Nebula is captured and in return for the opening sequence's actions, she is handed over to the Guardians to be returned to the Nova Corp for imprisonment, but due to Rocket's incredibly short-sighted (and later fortuitous actions) things go terribly wrong, and Peter Quill is reunited with his father, who turns out to be a living planet with less than benevolent intentions for the galaxy. A new character is introduced, some of the previous film's side characters have much more expanded roles, and there's even a surprise cameo (or two) that I somehow managed to avoid hearing anything about. How they got him is no surprise, but how they got *him*? I swear Marvel has a time machine. Even the Stan Lee cameo (which if it's his last, is fitting) manages to explain how he keeps showing up in every movie.

This is possibly the most colourful Marvel film to date, which is relevant considering how often Marvel Studios has been criticized for its limited colour palette. Ego's World alone rivals Dr Strange's trippy visuals, and his little pods showing Peter his history have a fascinating artistic flair of their own, very evocative of someone who can perfectly replicate life, but has no real understanding of what it means to be human (or any of the other species). There are even moments of absurdity that stretch your suspension of disbelief to the point where they'd be at home in Spaceballs, but still stay within the boundaries set by the film.

No one in the entire cast was a slouch, either. The main cast delivered two-fold on the first movie's performances, and Yondu and Nebula's expanded presences were very strong as well, fleshing them both out and breathing much more life into their otherwise limited characters. The Sovereign managed to make the Nova Corps look downright humble and friendly. Kurt Russel's Ego was seductively charming and totally believable as space-rogue Star Lord's father, and disturbingly menacing once the big plot twist was revealed. The change in dynamic from Groot being a heavy to being a comedic and lovable character worked well. The stand-out performance, though, goes surprisingly to Dave Bautista's Drax, who was having a blast throughout the entire film. His unrelenting optimism coupled with a tempered naivete gave some of the most memorable moments throughout the film.

You great big goof. Don't ever change. 

The one thing that sealed the love letter to the old series, though, was Yondu's fin. Once it appears, Yondu has the most badass moment of the entire film, walking calmly through the carnage he's causing, with the ridiculous red head-fin of the comics proudly on display.

Spoilers ending here: You should definitely see this. Guardians, as a franchise, is less connected to the MCU as a whole, and it has a lot more humour than the rest of the MCU, Ant-Man aside, and is much more easily relatable on its own, but it is hands down the best space opera I've seen in years, surpassing The Force Awakens, Rogue One, Star Trek Beyond, and even its predecessor.

One thing I'd like to point out, unrelated to the movie itself, was that during the trailers, Thor: Ragnarok got a bigger audience pop than Star Wars: The Last Jedi. Maybe it was a better trailer. Maybe it was audience bias for premiere night of the newest Marvel Studios film. All I know is that a few people cheered for Jedi, but there was widespread applause for Ragnarok.

Salem Watches A Movie: Captain America: Civil War

Minor spoilers ahead.

Marvel is treading some really interesting ground lately. While the comics are simultaneously being bashed for not being diverse enough and celebrated for changing genders, identities, and races of prominent characters, the movies are quietly slipping in some rather Libertarian-esque ideals, especially in the Captain America films. While the first one was predictably a super-hero war film, the second one was an insightful exploration of governmental surveillance, with SHIELD's Insight helicarriers capable of surveilling and potentially "removing" targets that could question the agenda of the people running them. Similarly, Captain America: Civil War deals with the subject of governmental oversight and Captain Rogers is now two for two in resisting government overreach (violently when necessary), and doing so in a way that presents the topic in a much more effective way than the comics that inspired it did.

Interestingly, there's been an argument that Cap is a soldier, and is clearly in the wrong for disobeying orders. Now I'm no soldier, but I grew up in a military family, but all the same I'll let a soldier debunk that one.

In the comics, there was a tragedy in Stamford, CT that involved a showboating young superhero team, a dangerous villain, and the loss of over six hundred lives which led to a superhuman registration act. In the movie, trainee superhero Wanda Maximoff, recruited at the end of the last Avengers film, is responsible for the accident when she saves Captain America's life by diverting an explosion (that could have killed dozens of people at ground level) not quite far enough into the air to keep it from killing the dozens of people in the building above the market. These events lead to the Sokovia Accords, an attempt to reign in the Avengers under governmental oversight, and both Cap and Tony Stark's team make good arguments for and against it, even having moments where they question their respective decisions. The difference here being that the Superhuman Registration Act of the comics is a clear human rights violation, applying equally to people who operation with self-created enhancements and people born with said enhancements, such as mutants. The Sokovia Accords is much more of a grey area politically, lending Team Stark a much stronger stance.

Marvel films have a formula at this point. They're 12 movies in since Iron Man kicked it off, and they all have similar characteristics: slick character designs that are realistic but pay heavy tribute to their sources, snappy dialogue, and character development that takes place both on and off the battlefield. It's a tribute to the people making the decisions here that, twelve movies in, it doesn't yet feel stale, and there are scenes in this movie that still register a strong emotional response: the fear at Rhodey's "dead stick" moment, Ant-Man's "something big", RDJ's stunning line delivery of "so was I" or meeting Spider-man and Black Panther.

Civil War is both everything we could have hoped for in a super-hero movie, and a fitting chapter in the MCU's story. The only real criticism I have is that this is yet another Marvel film with a weak villain, as has been the norm. (Loki still remains the only well-fleshed out villain in the MCU.) That said, the villain has a good motivation and a brilliant scheme, but we spend so little time with him that he may as well not even be there.

Always #TeamCap

The most surprising thing is that this movie has over a dozen significant characters, and doesn't leave any of them short on screen time, development, or spotlight. Obviously, we're introduced to Spidey and Black Panther in this movie. The former is a big deal because there's been no fewer than five Spider-Man movies in recent history, with only the first two gaining universal acclaim. (For the record, I quite enjoyed the last two, even though they're more or less the least popular.) The general consensus is that Tom Holland's MCU Spidey got everything right that the last 5 movies couldn't, and he did it in maybe 20 minutes of screen time. With the latter, I feel it could be argued that Black Panther is a little overpowered, but then he is one of the most intelligent and capable heroes in the comics as well, so it fits.
All in all, Civil War is an excellent movie. Well worth the price of admission, even if you want to see it in IMAX or 3D. It's fun, it's compelling, and it sets up the next chapters in the MCU well.

Batman Punches Superman: Dawn of Injustice

I've now seen Deadpool three times in the theatre: Once at the normal cinema I go to, once in IMAX (my first IMAX movie!) and once with a friend that came to visit. I'm also looking forward to Captain America: Civil War. I bring these up because I do not have the mixed feelings for the vast majority of Marvel films that I do for Batman vs. Superman. And it can't be just that I'm a Marvel fanboy -- I love Batman and the Bat-family more than I do any one particular Marvel hero, even RDJ's Tony Stark.

(Erin says: It's true. He practically has a fetish for Batgirl.)

But if I'm honest, I've never been a Superman fan to begin with. The Reeves films were variable in quality, with the first one being the only truly good one (minus the time travel sequence), and Superman Returns actually put me to sleep despite the absolute perfection of casting Kevin Spacey as Lex Luthor. I honestly didn't think Man of Steel was that bad, but then... I'm not a fan of Superman, so that's probably why. So continuing the Man of Steel thread into BvS was really my only interest as far as Superman is concerned, and BvS was definitely a Man of Steel sequel... for all that's worth. No, the reason I forked out the cash for two IMAX tickets (You're welcome, Jacob) was Batfleck.

I have spoken previously on the subject of Batfleck, and I stand by my previous words. Ben Affleck as Batman was inspired. There has not been a Batman on film yet that had the physicality, the stature, and the cold rage that drives a Batman that Ben Affleck brought to the role. No one yet has looked the part so much and made me believe the role so much. I'm ready to say that Batfleck currently has my Number 2 slot, behind the Arkham/Animated Batman of Kevin Conroy. Any part of this film that has either Batman or Alfred in it could easily be cut out and still be good watch on its own.

Gal Gadot's Wonder Woman is pretty great, too (when she's there). This is the first time I've seen a live-action Wonder Woman I enjoyed, and she had far too little screen time.

This is what we've been missing from cinematic Batman.

The rest of the cast does not fare as well:

• Henry Cavill looks the part still, but falls utterly flat. He's basically got two emotions: Mope and Rage. As I've mentioned, I'm not even a Superman fan, but even I know that Superman operates on a much broader range than that, and with an air of underlying optimism at all times. 
• Jesse Eisenberg is hopelessly mis-cast as Luthor, even taking into account he's not technically Lex but rather his son Alexander. Eisenberg would have been much better served being cast in the inevitable Batfleck movie as The Riddler, as his performance is much closer in line to Arkham's deranged, SAW-esque version of Riddler than any previous Luthor. 
• Amy Adams is basically forgettable as Lois Lane, and Laurence Fishburne's Perry White has somehow turned into a caricature of himself.

The story and pacing of the movie is all over the place, and has the feel of two movies that were forced into one due to budgetary constraints. There's a difference between “X happens, which leads to Y, which leads to Z” and “X happens, then Y happens, then Z happens” and this movie is definitely the latter.

I hate to lay the blame at the feet of any one person in particular, yet I can't help but question Zach Snyder on this. He says he understands and loves the characters, but it genuinely feels like he read only two stories -- Injustice: Gods Among Us and The Dark Knight Returns -- and ran with those. Not only are these stories out of comic-book continuity, the are also set in worlds in which things have gone horribly wrong and the characters are forced to take actions they would not normally otherwise take.

In Injustice, the Joker murders Lois Lane and Superman completely loses it, gravely injuring Batman who tries to stop him and seizing world power with a coalition of super-powered heroes. In Dark Knight, government overreach leads to a near-totalitarian state with Superman a government puppet, prompting Batman to finally take him down. While gripping stories, neither of these are accurate portrayals of Batman and Superman. 

In short, BvS isn't as bad as Rotten Tomatoes and the drama-addicted movie critics would have you believe, and it has some quite excellent scenes, but the movie has some real problems. I'd genuinely recommend watching it at some point, but rent it rather than paying to see it in theatres. As of this writing, a Batman film starring and directed by Affleck has been confirmed, and Suicide Squad is still coming fairly soon, so I can only hope that Dawn of Justice serves its primary purpose of serving as a springboard for a larger DC universe, and that it will bring us films of tMCU or Nolanverse quality instead of more bombs like Green Lantern or Man of Steel.

Prior to this, I had some level of faith in Zach Snyder. I didn't hate Sucker Punch (unlike most everyone else), and Watchmen and 300 were good movies. But this isn't a promising start to DC's cinematic universe.

The Finest Redemption Story in Superhero Movies

My first attempt at watching Deadpool did not go so well. It had nothing to do with the movie; that, without going into too much detail too early, was really quite good. No, it was the case of grinding stomach cramps that started about halfway through the film, followed by my car not starting after the movie, capped off with nearly a week of gastroenteritis that put a damper on the evening. So I did all of you, my faithful readers, a favour and went to see it again. In IMAX. I swear, the things I do for you lot...

I've been aware of Deadpool for a very long time. I've seen his start as just another terrible Rob Liefeld creation, be-pouched and violent with a name made of two gritty words, generic as all hell in his fight against gritty, be-pouched and hyperviolent sort-of anti-hero Cable, another terrible Rob Liefeld creation. But I've seen him grow in the hands of more creative writers and artists into something different, something almost beautiful, one of those tragedies that just can't stop laughing because if he does, it'll hurt too much to go on. His finest redemption came with that of Cable, his brother-in-90s-badness, in the simply-titled Cable & Deadpool, and it's one of the best series I've ever read. Since then, he's been on a meteoric rise to pop culture fame, and now he's every-goddamn-where. Like it or not, Wade Wilson has struck gold.

But how was the movie? The FOX X-Films have been varying in quality, with the two decent-to-good and one poor X-Men, one terrible and one much better Wolverine, and the First Class trilogy, 2/3 complete with the excellent First Class and quite good Days of Future Past, and the concluding X-Men: Apocalypse on the way. Deadpool is, quite frankly, the best of all of them, possibly even the one with Apocalypse. It's on par with the better Marvel Studios films, with a faithfulness and wit that no one saw coming.

Add caption

Let's get a few things out of the way (as well as a spoiler warning): this is a film that more than earns its R rating. The language is crass. There's nudity, female as well as... well, Deadpool wang. Floppy, scarred Deadpool wang. The violence is visceral, detailed, and astoundingly gratuitous. And all of it grabs you and does not let go and shouts in your face “THIS IS NECESSARY.”

To release a family-friendly cut of this film would more than likely render it perhaps half an hour long. But every decapitated body part, every glimpse of flesh, every foul word serves a purpose to paint a picture of the world Deadpool inhabits and the circles he moves in,  places which were heretofore unexplored in the X-Men films.And speaking of the X-Men, there's another character with a true redemption here: Colossus, last seen as the hunky member of a boy-band covered in chrome paint, has been fixed. 

He's now ENORMOUS, not just above average tall and muscular; the chrome has been toned down; and his attitude matches what it should have always been: a farmboy raised under Communism who is now living in America with a supportive family unit. He's simultaneously the ultimate cuddly big brother (no pun intended), human wrecking ball, and source of some of the movie's best laughs -- not at his own expense, but at his optimistic reactions to the situations he finds himself in as well as the faith he shows in Deadpool.

I dare you not to love this guy.

Deadpool himself is a gem. He's portrayed with just the right amount of weird (not the lol-so-random that some writers saddle him with) and he moves perfectly. Agile, fast, accurate, he's a real menace on the field, elevated from minor threat to nigh-on unstoppable force by his regenerative powers, taking only a moment to stick his finger through a bullet hole in his arm and swear at the guy that shot him. Ryan Reynolds really gets the character, and I feel happy for him about it. He deserves this. He's been working a hell of a long time to make this happen, and he's redeemed both himself and the character from its dreadful portrayal in X-Men Origins: Wolverine, which is alluded to several times in the film (including showing the action figure, for which I've supplied a visual aid). This is nearly everything we wanted from Deadpool on-screen, and certainly far more than we ever expected to get considering a) the last time he was on-screen and b) it's not a Marvel Studios film.

Yep. That's the one in the movie, and I have one.

And speaking of that, it's really a shame that it's not, but it wouldn't surprise me if there was some form of crossover being set up. The final battle does appear to take place on a decommissioned helicarrier that looks like it's straight out of SHIELD's fleet. Reynolds's Deadpool is now added to the Downey Jr. Stark/Jackman Wolverine teamup I dearly want to see.

The film wasn't perfect, though; some pretty hefty details from Deadpool's origin were missing. The organization that performed the experiments on him didn't seem to be Weapon X, but they didn't explicitly name it anything else, so it still could be; Vanessa wasn't a mutant or a mercenary, and she was a much more morally sound character than she was in the comics; Colossus's trainee X-student, Negasonic Teenage Warhead, looks nothing like she does in the comics and seems to have Cannonball's power; and most damning of all, Deadpool's inner monologue does not speak in little yellow boxes.

But all in all, this is a mark in the win category, not only for how good it was, but how much money it's made. As I write this, I think it's past the 500 million mark, and it's cleared the record for highest-grossing R rated film ever. The viral marketing campaign for it was genius, allowing Reynolds to ham it up in-character in all manner of situations not in any way related to the film, just for us to get a taste of his performance and assure us that the movie did, indeed, know what it were doing.

The trailer cuts were smart, too. The “pity the guy that pressures her into prom sex”line is there, but it makes perfect sense in context, but Vanessa's line about not being a damsel in distress is gone from the final cut.

If you haven't seen it, and you've survived the cascade of spoilers, please go see it. It's great fun, as long as you're not easily offended. And Ryan Reynolds, of all people, deserves this. This was the man's last chance; he'd already screwed up twice in comic films before the great Marvel Studios flood that started with Iron Man. If he messed up again, he was done. But he didn't.

He deserves this film, and so do you.

Salem Watches a Movie -- Star Wars: The Force Awakens

The spoilers are calling to you... just let them in.

It's 2:17 pm Mountain time, Sunday the 20^th of December. I've just left the theatre after seeing Star Wars: The Force Awakens. You may have noticed that I'm not in a state of either euphoric bliss nor am I fuming with rage. As I've shamefully admitted before, I'm not really a fan of Star Wars. I'm not big on sword and sorcery type of fantasy to begin with, and setting it in space doesn't do it any favours, as I tend to see background characters and objects and want to know more about them than I do the flashy Jedi and Sith that are prominently in the foreground of the story.

And so, with The Force Awakens, has the story been brought to a level that I can appreciate? Yeah. Yeah, I think it has. One thing that the original films had over the prequel trilogy is that the characters were relatable. Every character in the prequel trilogy, without exception, was either dull and aloof or ham-handedly overacting, but those in the original trilogy were easily identifiable: the wide-eyed, naive farmboy; the haughty but tough princess; the cocky jackass space pirate.

The characters in The Force Awakens definitely veer more towards the original trilogy than the prequel trilogy, and not just the ones returning from the original films. Poe Dameron is the biggest smartass in a galaxy far, far away, Finn's got great comedic timing, and Rey is really likable. I can't think of a single character that could have been replaced with a block of wood to no detrimental effect to the film. (Hayden Christiansen, I'm looking at you.) And most importantly, there was not one comic relief character! Several characters had great comedic moments, yes, but there was no character dedicated to comic relief. Even C-3P0 was toned down from the original trilogy, and not a hint of Jar Jar or Ewoks in sight, anywhere. Even in the big alien bar scene, there were no “funny aliens”; in fact, the only really strange one was a meaningful character.  But on characterization, there are a few points that have been rather controversial lately.

In my opinion, Rey is a little bit Mary Sue. She's a little OP. Given her background in scavenging on a lawless desert planet, I can buy her combat expertise and engineering, but she's piloting a notoriously stubborn spaceship in incredibly breathtaking maneuvers after it has been parked for years, successfully using the Jedi Mind Trick with her first real try, and going toe to toe with the badguy by the end. I think I have eyestrain at this point from rolling my eyes so hard at people defending Rey by saying "Well Anakin was a Mary Sue, too!" People, if you have to compare your character to Anakin Skywalker to defend her, that's not a good thing. That said, Daisy Ridley pulled it off. I still like the character, and am willing to overlook her flaws (or lack thereof, considering that a flawed character is an interesting character) because of her performance. I just feel that people are praising her for the same reason they bashed Clara Oswald over on Doctor Who.

The special effects have advanced to a point where, when watching the dogfights in this film, you really feel like you're watching real spaceships shooting at each other instead of just advanced CGI. Possibly because of the practical effects and model work, and partly due to advancements in technology, this time around it really feels like you're watching actual things and not just a digital approximation of things. Seeing the Millenium Falcon swooping and diving in such visceral style was stomach-lurching, and the first time in the entire series I really felt like I was watching a spaceship in flight. The dogfights between X-Wings and TIE fighters have never looked better.

Choreography is a real sticking point for me as well. Granted, it can be easily explained away by saying 'That's just how the Jedi Order taught people how to fight and Luke wasn't trained by the Order” but in the prequel trilogies, it never felt like any particular swing of a lightsaber blade was aimed at anything but another lightsaber blade. With Luke and Vader, you could tell Luke was really trying to take Vader out. Likewise, in the climactic lightsaber battle of this movie, Finn and Kylo Ren, and later Rey and Kylo, really feel like they're trying to carve bits off of each other and barely care that the other has just as dangerous a weapon. Whereas in the prequel trilogy any strike of a lightsaber felt as if it had no impact, here I cringed every time one made contact. 

And speaking of Kylo Ren... while I don't particularly like him, at least he was a character. Unlike Darth Maul in the prequels, who had two lines and then just glowered menacingly before twirling his baton and flipping through the air like a majorette on whatever they were feeding Simpson over on Jessica Jones. Kylo Ren's character had a purpose, and almost had a story arc (and might still), but overall, he fell in with the other baddies in this film as my main disappointment. Kylo Ren and Captain Phasma got a ton of pre-release hype, but just turned out... less than impressive. The First Order officers came across as comically, over-the-top evil, with uniforms an imagery that unsubtly screamed Nazi allegory, and when the Stormtroopers gave their salute to their leader (whose name I don't think I actually heard at any point), I swear I heard somebody in the theater mutter “Hail Hydra.”

It might have been me.

Erin says: I like to call this scene Triumph of the Whills.
If you don't get that reference, you aren't a proper nerd. 

I'll tell you who my favourite character in the whole thing was: that Riot Control Stormtrooper. The one who spotted Finn, shouted “TRAITOR!” and dropped his weapon, then proceeded to throw Finn a beatdown with an electrified nightstick while Finn was holding a lightsaber.

That guy. Yeah. I want his action figure. Shame he's only available in a 2-pack.

Overall, this movie is certainly worth your time. It's not the most fun space opera I've seen in recent years (I'm sorry, Guardians of the Galaxy still has that spot), but it's close.

Update: I bought the 2-pack. Riot Trooper now stands proudly on my desk.

Salem Watches a Movie: The Indelible Ant-Man

Warning: what is this, a spoiler for ants?

Ant-Man, the latest entry into the Marvel Cinematic Universe, is not a big, flashy event movie like an Avengers or Iron Man title would be. The events don’t, at least at first glance, hold earth-shaking implications for the greater narrative of the MCU. Startling revelations are not made about previously beloved characters.

And you know what? That's OK. It's exactly what it needs to be. After the last few films it's nice to get a fun little flick that works on a few levels and doesn't amp up the adrenaline level of the MCU.

Like most Marvel films, Ant-Man is primarily a genre film first, with added superhero panache. Like Winter Soldier was a spy film with superheroes, Thor was a fantasy film with superheroes, and Guardians of the Galaxy was a space opera with superheroes, Ant-Man is a tight, competent heist movie with superheroes (and shades of the old 50s giant insect movies). It's certainly not on the level of The Italian Job or Ocean's Eleven (or even Ocean's Twelve), it does its job well and retains the trademark Marvel sense of fun while displaying a level of technical storytelling that wouldn't be present in one of the event films like Age of Ultron. While Age of Ultron brought us “Bad guy uses space metal to lift a city and drop it in an extinction-level event,” Ant-Man instead gives us “Reluctant criminal uses liquid nitrogen to expand the door and locking mechanism of a safe and blow it open.”

The character work in this film in interesting as well, as it brings us a new take on a hero. Paul Rudd's Scott Lang is a bit of a fuckup. Like Chris Pratt's Star-Lord, he's very good at what he does, but unlike Star Lord is nowhere near the master criminal he'd like to think he is, as evidenced by the opening scenes showing him being released from San Quentin, and then later being arrested twice, once even in the Ant-Man suit. There's something really humanizing about the protagonist being someone who really just wants to do the right thing but constantly goes about it the wrong way.

Michael Douglas (finally!) brings us the Marvel Universe's most maligned super-genius, Hank Pym, and adds a really interesting human touch as a much older character (even having an altercation with Howard Stark and an aged (but lovely) Peggy Carter in the opening) who is a driven scientist and neglectful father filled with regret over a tragedy in his life. His daughter, Hope Van Dyne (portrayed by Evangeline Lily, who I don't think I've ever seen in anything before), is bitter and angry, and as we learn by the end of the film, has every right to be. 

Aside from the continuity nod to Howard Stark and Peggy Carter, there's an appearance by The Falcon, making up for the disappointment of not seeing him in action on Age of Ultron, with a proper throw-down between he and Lang. This is probably the best and most blatant bit of fan-service in the film: a throwback to the superhero crossovers of comics, where two heroes meet, fight, and team up... only this one is without the team-up. The fight is fantastic, utilizing both Falcon's and Ant-Man's power sets well, especially with Lang ending it by straight-up cheating.

Ant-Man is not a driving narrative piece of the MCU, but I feel it's what we need right now. A smaller story, with a few ties to the other, larger pieces and a chance to catch our breath after Winter Soldier, Guardians of the Galaxy, and Age of Ultron one right after the other, and Civil War in May of next year. And speaking of Civil War – stay after the credits. You'll see some familiar faces. 

Pictured: Team Ant. Seriously, how does this keep happening? 

Seriously. Go see Ant-Man. It's fun, it's down-to-earth and fantastical at the same time, and it's really good. 

And keep an eye on Hank Pym's key-chain.  

Salem Watches a Movie(ish) – Doctor Who: Deep Breath

Well, ok, it's not a movie. But it was in the theater.

So after much careful deliberation on available funds, I decided to go ahead and pre-order a ticket to the theater showing of the season premier of Doctor Who. I'm not even going to try and figure out which season this is, seeing as how that one year that we had the feature-length episodes with Tennant may or may not be counted as an individual series and keeps throwing off my organizational folders. Technically, this would be the third time I've seen the episode (that's counting timeshifting the original airing, mind you, I would never ever ever watch that leaked workprint. Promise. And I haven't seen the next two episodes that leaked, either. Promise), but I missed Day of the Doctor in theaters, so I wasn't missing this one. As usual, spoilers ahead.

You know me and green women.

A nice extra to those of us who saw the episode was a vlog made by potato-head Strax prior to the episode, with guest appearance by the gorgeous Madame Vastra and her wife/maid Jenny. It served as a nice intro to people that may not be familiar with the series history, as well a chance to throw in some pretty hilarious piss-takes on the older series, such as referring to the Third Doctor as “an unfortunate hybrid between Man and Granny.” Strax is always welcome. Another bonus was the return of the “Doctor Who Confidential” behind-the-scenes documentary. Highlights were the effects that went into the villain of the episode, and seeing Peter Capaldi at the first read-through.

Speaking of Capaldi, we finally see this new Doctor in action. Previously, all we had of him was him in a panic, decrying his kidneys, or the cameo in Day of the Doctor, where his eyebrows stole the show. Watching him in action is truly a treat, as he is possibly the most talented actor to date to hold the role, and he's obviously enjoying himself immensely, possibly more so than Matt or David before him. I don't even have to use flowery words here like gravitas or presence (although I technically just did), as Capaldi easily has the energy and intensity of his predecessors, coupled with experience and bearing. In his post-regeneration trauma, he's wildly unstable and nigh-incoherent, but once his mind settles, what we have is a razor-sharp, intense Doctor with a brusque irascibility which recalls the classic series in a very comforting way.

Some of the best banter in the series.

There's been rumor that Jenna Coleman may be leaving at the end of this series, but I'm hoping she doesn't. I've been on the fence about Clara until now. She's clever and independent, but she always felt too comfortable around the Doctor, literally having more conflict with the TARDIS herself than with him. Witnessing this regeneration has really thrown her a curveball, and she's questioning just how safe she, and those around her, are with this stranger. “If his face is new, where did all these lines come from?” From this conflict, we get two outstanding scenes. Madame Vastra's questioning of her resulting in Clara losing her temper, and the wonderful bickering in the restaurant. Capaldi and Coleman have some amazing chemistry, and I really hope we get more than one series with them.

The guest cast in this episode really shines, as well. Vastra, Jenny, and Strax return, and some of the quieter moments in the episode are really carried by them. Jenny serving as Vastra's muse when she's not even doing art, Clara and Strax's banter around her 'medical exam,' and the touching moment during the climax, where we get what is possibly television's first interspecies lesbian kiss. The villain, a version of the returning Clockwork Robots from the acclaimed “Girl in the Fireplace” is extremely menacing, and really comes across as this inhuman, mechanical monster that quite literally has a screw loose, and the ending scene has a wonderfully creepy woman named Missy that's setting up the teaser for the series arc. And that's not even to mention the preceding scene, which has a truly touching cameo from a surprise guest

My final impressions on this episode, and the event of seeing it in the theater, is that it was worth the wait from the previous series, and worth the ticket price to see it on the big screen. Capaldi shines, and has wonderful chemistry with Clara. I've got high hopes for the remainder of the series, and the direction that Capaldi will help steer this ship in.

Salem Watches A Movie: Guardians of the AAAHH IIIIEEE AHHH HOOKED ON A FEELING

I'm high on believing. That I'm in love with this film.

Now that I've gotten that out of the way...

     So the last few times I've watched a movie for Erin's blog, it hasn't turned out well. I was rendered nearly unintelligible by World War Z, and simply confused by Age of Extinction. I'm happy to report that, this time around, I can not only recommend, but heartily urge anyone who hasn't seen Guardians of the Galaxy to go see it. I'll try to avoid spoilers. I've only lightly skimmed the comics myself, so I'm not overly familiar with the characters. I know who they are, but I don't know how accurately they are portrayed. I can say, however, that they stand on their own without prior knowledge of the team. I described this film as Han Solo guest-starring in the greatest episode of Farscape ever, and I stand by that description.

     The tone of this film is set from the very first moments where the main protagonist, Chris Pratt's “Star Lord” (aka Peter Quill) clomps menacingly onto the screen only to press play on an ancient Walkman, pop his mask, and proceed to lipsync and, in glorious fashion, shuck and jive his way through the ruins of an ancient city to the tune of Redbone's “Come And Get Your Love,” punctuated by moments of catching alien rats and using them as cod-microphones. This movie steadfastly refuses to take itself too seriously, and it benefits greatly from it. It's not technically a comedy, and it's not technically a space opera, but it's got enough of both to succeed as either simultaneously.

     On paper, this really shouldn't have worked, either. I mean, yes, it's a Marvel film. It had budget behind it and momentum from Marvel's previous films, but on paper? It's a smaller, niche group of characters with less exposure. Iron Man? Lot of people know him. Captain America? His death in the comics hit mainstream news. Guardians of the Galaxy? Totally niche, and to the rest of the public evokes such cinematic disasters as "Masters of the Universe" or "Prisoners of the Lost Universe." It's directed by a guy that used to make films for Troma Films. TROMA. Toxic Avengers. The team has a wrestler, two CGI characters, and a TV comedy actor. Zoe Saldana is the only one with major mainstream success in the main cast. But it all falls together. It all works.

     This is a team of distinct protagonists with great chemistry between each character. Dave Bautista's performance was probably the weakest, and he was still a great character. Vin Diesel managed to take a CGI character with one (repeated) line and give it so much depth that it made cry a little at one point. Chris Pratt was the perfect balance of absurdity and competency. Zoe Saldana's Gamora was menacing, dangerous, and a little bit vulnerable. And Bradley Cooper's (cast for his voice, known for his face) Rocket stole every scene he was in. Even the bit players, like the Nova Corp or Space-Merle (Michael Rooker's portrayal of Yondu) were memorable.

     The villains were a little on the weak side. Thanos, the big bad teased at the end of Avengers, was very sinister and threatening, but Ronan and Nebula could have been handled better. By the end of the film, I'm still not sure (besides possible religious zealot) what Ronan's motivations are. Nebula was excellent (angry shouty stabby Scottish cyborg) and came across as a very competent baddie, but I just kept wanting to see more of her than Ronan, especially the scenes where she and Gamora interact. There's chemistry between these two that I can only hope we'll see in later installments. The menace was there from the baddies in the film, but they could have had more impact.

     Early on in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, I kept thinking things like “How can they make an Iron Man movie?” “How can they make a Thor movie?” “These characters aren't big enough to headline their own films.” But this one? This could be Marvel's Star Wars. Guardians of the Galaxy and its success (92% fresh rating on RT, $94 million opening weekend) has proven, at least in my mind, that Marvel can make films out of any of its properties.

    Or even resurrect a previously shamed one. Stay after the credits, folks.