The Atlas of the 'Verse

It is with great pride that I announce the release of Quantum Mechanix' Atlas of the 'Verse, Volume1. I say "pride" because, for the past two years, I was part of the Brain Trust that helped develop this beast.

Of course, I don't want to overstate my contribution here. Most of the work was done by Ben "Whitefall" Mund, he of the amazing graphical skills, and J. Chris Bourdier helped with providing crunchy planetary dynamics. My job, in addition to the typical proofreading and error-spotting duties we all had, was to be That Person.

We all know that person is. The person who cues up the DVD of the docking sequence at Beaumonde just to see if the starport pit is drawn correctly, because for some reason her Browncoat senses were tingling. (It wasn't.)

Or the person who analyzes a cut-away of Mal's pistol (which, to be fair, is a prop and doesn't at all work the way the movie wants you to think it does) and compares it to the actual workings of pistols, drawing upon her real-life knowledge of guns and bullets and ballistics, and then argues for a month with folks about how no, the bullets won't feed properly if you put them there, you have to do this other way, I don't care how much work it is for you because, well, she's a fan and it's important for her that this product be as "right" as possible.

Yes, I was the rabid, screaming fangirl of the Brain Trust, and there were more than a few times I felt really shitty about arguing minutiae with people. But I was told, again and again, that no, my contributions were important, and that if I hadn't caught it then another fan would have, and by then it would be too late to correct the problem.

So, um, yeah. That's what I contributed, such as it was, and in return, my name is in the credits right next to Tim Minear. Go me!

From the product page, in case you didn't click on the link above:

The Verse at Your Fingertips

With hundreds of terraformed planets and moons, the worlds of Firefly/Serenity are vast, varied and ever-changing. And a smart captain – a captain who expects to carve a living out of the black – needs to know a lot about those worlds. Which planets sell low? Which pay high? What are the local customs, cultures and laws? And what’s the best path to maximize profit, minimize risk and keep flying.

That's why the Trader's Guild Association has issued this comprehensive guide to the New Canaan run: The Atlas of The Verse, Volume One.

The New Canaan run is favored by captains flying light- and mid-bulk transports for its diverse markets and exports. And for those who must occasionally live on the raggedy edge, its varied levels of law enforcement are a plus, as well. The route described in the 26 full-color pages of the Atlas spans 11 planetary systems, crossing from The Core through The Border to The Rim and back.

More than just a collection of facts and maps, The Atlas of The Verse gives you the measure of a place, with a bonus page of content for each system.

Here's just some of the shiny info you get:

• Introduction by Tim Minear, Executive Producer of Firefly.
• Planetary maps, historical profiles, industries, satellites and exports for:
• Londinium
• Persephone
• Beaumonde
• Silverhold
• Harvest (and Higgins’ Moon)
• New Canaan (and Lilac)
• Hera
• Shadow
• Ariel
• Osiris
• Sihnon
• Currency and coinage used throughout The Verse.
• Satellite maps of the Eavesdown Docks and Atoll City, Beaumonde.
• Cutaway diagram of the FlashKill grenade favored by freelance security everywhere.
• Higgins Industrial brochure on the best ceramics available in The Verse.
• A copy of the Independents' tactical map used in the Battle of Serenity Valley.
• The complete history of the Firefly Ship Works and its development timeline.
• And much more!

The Atlas of The Verse comes in the same format as the Serenity Blueprints Reference Pack: printed on 100-pound 12"x16" stock and spiral-bound. It's loaded with beautiful art, incredible renderings and detailed diagrams that really help bring The Verse to life. It's also fully compatible with the best-selling Map of The Verse (and makes a great companion piece!)

The Altas of The Verse: 26 pages of awesome for just $39.95.

Order it, because it is awesome.

Also, if you visit their webpage, you get a free PDF of Independent Scrip (Browncoat money) which you can download and print out to your grubby little heart's desire.

What are you waiting for? BUY IT!

What I've been up to lately

Shut up. It is too Monday if I say it is.

At any rate, I am pleased to announce that I am a member of the Quantum Mechanix Brain Trust. Which is a fancy way of saying "Whitefall makes awesome stuff and I, along with a bunch of other people, nitpick it to pieces in the name of accuracy." Thankfully, he's a good sport about it.

Now, I'd love to tell you all about what I'm working on for QMx -- and believe me, it's gao guhn shiny -- but gorramit, those pesky Alliance types brought along some lawyers and had me sign a Non-Disclosure Agreement. So less'n I want to get strung up, I can't tells ya nothin'.

Yet.

However....

How'd you like to earn a million bucks?


Okay, so it's a million in Alliance Credits. Still, wouldn't it be fun to roll around in naked?

Also as prizes: A Mal stunt pistol autographed by Captain Tightpants himself; a Kaylee statuette signed by Jewel Staite; and an original set of Serenity blueprints, signed by the graphic designers of the movie, Geoff Mandel and Tim Earls.

Whole lotta signin' going on, there.

Oh, yes. One more thing: Be sure to check out the Firefly Ship Works blog, where every two days or so you can get an update on not just the forthcoming Serenity model, but other geeky starships such as the NX-01 Enterprise, the Death Star, and... oh yes, wallpapers for the Cerberus, a military gunship variant of the Series 3 Firefly that was used in the War for Independence:


So yeah. Go, look, drool, and join the growing ranks of the Core-Techs.

I am an idiot

Apparently I was high on crack or something yesterday, because a complete set of BSG dogtags is $119.95, not $199.95.


But if you wanna spend two hundred bucks, send 'em to me instead. That much buys you a deep tongue kiss the next time you see me at a convention.

Buy my stuff

Remember this?



This is the character biography card that accompanies the Battlestar Galactica replica Starbuck dogtags. It, along with replica tags for Apollo, Adama, Athena, Helo, Tigh, and Chief Tyrol, can be bought from Quantum Mechanix for $19.95 each, or the full set can be yours for $119.95.


Quoting from the website:

Each character dog tag has been recreated in metal, plated in bronze and weathered to exactly match the tags as seen on the series. All dimensions are taken directly from screen-used dog tags. All serial numbers are screen-accurate, as well. Each set of dog tags is packed securely in a Battlestar Galactica-themed blister pack and features a matching neck chain and collectable character biography card with a description of that character's story so far (as of the end of Season 3).

If you're a fan of the show, I encourage you to buy a pair. If you're a fan of Palette, I encourage to you buy a bunch, because the more profitable they are, the more likely it is that QMx will be able to have me do more freelance projects (or, Lords of Kobol willing, maybe even hire me full-time.)

Support your local Geeky Goth Girl, and all that. ;)



EDIT: If you're not into wearing someone else's dogtags, you can always order a customized pair with your name on them.

My first real honest-to-goodness professional writing credit

Three years ago, the Cylons tried to murder the human race.

But we would not die.

Three years ago, the Cylons destroyed our colonies.

But we did not divide.

Three years ago, the Cylons swore to hunt us down and kill us all.

But they have been unable to make good on their pledge.

Humanity is proving very difficult to eradicate.

In this never-ending battle between humanity and Cylon, we are all warriors. Our struggle for survival demands constant wariness, constant preparation for the worst, a constant and unflagging spirit in the face of all alarms and disasters. If we have learned anything from the Cylons, it is this:

We must fight as one if we are to survive.

(Click on the link or you're a dirty toaster lover and traitor to your species)

RAC: What I'm currently working on

Blog posts may be sporadic for a while; in addition to my daily tasks I am now working on an assignment for Quantum Mechanix that is due next Wednesday.

It is a backgrounder -- which is to say, "A summary of pertinent information and facts about the subject at hand, provided to the media especially when dealing with a complex issue" -- about the Battlestar Galactica Propaganda Poster Set.

In order to give it that patented Erin Palette Kick in the Junk, I'm researching old World War 2 newsreels to get a feel for the cadence and structure of the words.

So remember: Buy Posters, or the Cylons Win!

RAC: Shiny new swag

Thought I'd share this with you...

As a "thank you" for the hard work I did for them, QMx was nice enough to send me a personalized Battlestar Galactica-style dogtag!

Inside this neat little metal box, suitable for holding Space Altoids...



... is a neat little bag (I wonder how many cubits it can hold?)...


... with this really shiny dogtag!


Yes, my serial number is "Elite" in l33tsp34k. I'm sure I'm going to Hell for that, but I'd be going there anyway, so why not have a bit of fun in the process?

Anyway, I'm told that this dogtag is unique. Whereas most personalized tags have random serial numbers, I was able to pick mine (because I'm special!) and I seriously doubt that combination will come up again. So, if you ever meet someone at a convention claiming to be Erin Palette, ask to see her dogtags! Because if they don't look like this, then she isn't me!

My tags also came with an "Induction Order," which is a fancy way of saying I've been drafted into the ranks of the Colonial Forces. (I hope I can qualify for flight status... I want to be a Raptor pilot!)



And that's really neat, because it wasn't long ago that I was discharged from the Independent Forces:



This came with my Ships' Papers and was a special deal restricted to those people who ordered within the first 24 hours (Thank you again, Nathan!) If you haven't bought one of these, you really need to... they only made 1500 of these, and 900 have already been sold.

Yes, I do believe I have sold my soul for geek swag.


----------------
Now playing: Bear McCreary - Passacaglia
via FoxyTunes

RAC: Holy Frak!

Remember this post?

Thanks to a cunningly exploited loophole, I can now show you what I was working on:


Yes, I wrote that. Pretty spiffy, wouldn't you say?

Alas, I can't tell you what project it's for... but if you go to the QMx website and nose around in the BSG section, I'm sure you can find some kind of product where a baseball-card picture and biography would be appropriate....

I'm just saying, is all.

I will now take this opportunity to answer a few questions from the audience. Spoilers ahead if you haven't seen the entirety of Season Three.


You completely left out Kara's marriage to Anders/ abusive childhood/ stint as CAG/ months of psychological torture by Leoben on New Caprica.

Unfortunately, I had to. I was given a limit of approximately 175 words. It's impossible to squeeze three years of character development into that short a space without leaving out key details. To get around this, and in an attempt to further reduce wordiness, I tried to write her bio in the style of a military personnel report. Which leads me to my next question...


What do you mean, presumed dead? We saw her at the end of the season finale!

Wrong.

First, you saw someone who, as part of a cliffhanger, claimed to be Starbuck. Until it's verified within the show, for now that's all it is: a claim. Hell, I don't care if you have a signed and notarized statement from Ron D. Moore saying that it's so; ideas come and go, plots are revised, scripts change and actors leave series all the time. Even if she is really alive by the end of Crossroads Part II, we have zero -- zero -- guarantee that the idea will remain unchanged by the time He That Believeth In Me goes to air.

Second, she shows up in the middle of a potential battle. Since, as I said earlier, I am writing this in the style of personnel report, there's no way said report would be updated while the Galactica was set to Condition One.


But isn't she a Cylon?

Man, I have no frakking idea. If I put "Starbuck might be one of the Final Five," and it turns out she isn't, I'll look like an idiot and that card will be wrong. Hell, we don't even know who the Final Five really are or what it means to be one. We suspect that Tyrol, Anders, Tigh and Foster are members, but don't know, and that's what gives the finale punch.

I wrote what I knew to be correct. You're welcome to hate me for it, but I refuse to speculate when writing professionally.


When we buy these widgets -- whatever they are -- will you sign them for me if we mail them to you?

Yes.

----------------
Now playing: Richard Gibbs - Starbuck Buck Buck
via FoxyTunes

RAC: Recruitment

This just in!

You will not hear of this anywhere else! This is an exclusive scoop!

Quantum Mechanix, whom I have completely infiltrated with my Radion Accelerator Corps, has apparently decided the best way to shut me up.... is to hire me!

Yes, you read that correctly! I am now working on a writing assignment for QMx!

Not a dream! Not a hoax! This is real!

More details, of course, as I am allowed to release them. (I can't [yet] talk about what I'm working on.)

Of course, nothing is stopping me from talking about things I am not working on, and now that I, the leader of the RAC, am firmly ensconced within their power structure...

... no secrets shall be hidden from me!

*cue ominous thunder*

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!


...


That is all.

RAC: Update on the Ship's Papers

Sources deep within my Radion Accelerator Corps tell me that the Ship's Papers will have a release date of August 25.

You heard it here first.

RAC: Ship's Papers

Pay attention, Browncoats! This is important.

Remember when I leaked the Official Press Release by Quantum Mechanix and I said that while I knew what Whitefall was making, I didn't yet have proof?

I have proof now.

And, as promised, this is at the very least as shiny as the Serenity Blueprints, and probably moreso, since this is something you can touch/hold/play with/use as a prop.

Fellow Flans, I present to you... the Official Serenity Ship Papers:


As I mentioned before, Whitefall has a reputation within the Flan community as a quality maker of props and replicas. One of his top sellers was, you guessed it, Firefly Ship's Papers, so when I heard that he'd been hired by QMx my initial guess was that either the Ship's Papers or the Map of Serenity Valley would be his first official product. I didn't say anything about the papers, because they seemed too complex to make compared to a map and, quite frankly, I didn't want to say anything for fear of jinxing it.

"But Palette," I hear you say, "how is this new product any niftier than Whitefall's old stuff?" I'm very glad you asked me that, Voice in my Head, because here is why:

Old Stuff:

• Only 5 pages.
• Made one at a time... each packet took months to make.
  
• Cost between $200 - $300 when they were put on eBay.

New Stuff:

• No less than thirteen pages, plus an Alliance bribe and a designer's certification of authenticity.
• All sheets were made under the supervision of Geoff Mandel, the graphic designer of the Serenity movie, to ensure that each piece is as authoritative and accurate as possible.
  
• Access to studio archives means movie source art is included, so that the entire package has the look and feel of the Serenity 'Verse.
• One of the sheets is a "Crew Roster" with signature spaces. That's right, if by some chance you should happen to meet our Big Damn Heroes at a convention, you not only have a gao guhn place for them to put their autograph, but doing so only increases the value of your Ship's Papers!
• Of course, there's also the fact that since this is an official licensed product, buying this means that there will be more shinies being made by QMx for Browncoat consumption, and of course you don't have to get on a waiting list as each unit is made.

So as you can see, it's not so much an expansion of the original as it is a completely new and much better re-imagining.

Keeping in mind that such things are subject to change, here are the specifics as I know them:

• 13 full-color sheets, up to 8.5 x 14" in size.
  
• Certificates are hand-stamped with official Alliance seals, and hand-signed in both English and Chinese.
  
• They come in a fashion-grade leather wallet with brass snap fittings (for the cover) and a screw-down plate (to keep the papers in place).
  
• Limited to 1,500 pieces.
  
• Price: between $120 and $130. So for essentially half the price, you get twice the goods. Where in the 'Verse will you get a better deal than that?

Eris willing, my Bothan spies will be able to get me a review piece and then I'll be able to tell you in graphic detail why this product is so incredibly awesome, you'll want to sell a kidney for it.

But then, I suspect you're all rabid fans anyway, so I'm preaching to the choir. Still, I promied you bowel-looseningly cool, didn't I? And I delivered!

Edit: new information here.

RAC: Blue Sun Travel Posters

Remember the sneak preview of the Miranda Poster? My Bothan spy within the RAC broke a fingernail to bring me this information:

Just keeping you in the loop on developments. We're doing a pre-launch sale of the Series 1 Blue Sun Travel Posters exclusively through the California Browncoats, to help them with their Comic-Con fund-raising. This is *not* the official launch; that'll happen in a few weeks. They've only gotten 300 sets (done as a special run) and there won't be any more until the launch happens in August.

Hmm. Blue Sun Travel Posters.

Oh, I wonder what they might look like! Will you tell me, Mister Browncoat PDF?


Oh, goody! *claps hands merrily*

EXPLORE THE ‘VERSE – WITH BLUE SUN TRAVEL!

The Blue Sun Travel Company encourages citizens of the Alliance to explore the many amazing vistas that comprise our proud republic. It’s a great big ‘Verse full of fabulous sights to see and exotic cultures to experience. Whether you partake in the ancient and noble tea ceremony at the Companion Guild House on Sihnon, behold the awesome canyons of glass and steel on Londinum, enjoy the many distractions of the Gateway District on Persephone, shed a tear for our fallen Alliance heroes at the Monument at Serenity Valley, or be among the first to experience the pure tranquility of Miranda, a multitude of star systems full of unparalleled adventure await you.

And Blue Sun Travel is ready to take you there.

In an effort to help inspire future honored guests, Blue Sun Travel is publishing several art print sets showcasing some of the many locations that we can take you to. In the past you would have only seen prints of this quality adorning the walls of your local Blue Sun Travel office, or proudly displayed in high-traffic areas like Persephone’s Eavesdown Docks or along the bustling streets of Beaumonde. But now, thanks to our partnership with fellow Blue Sun subsidiary, Quantum Mechanix Inc., you too can own a set of Blue Sun Travel Posters.

This officially licensed set contains 5 full-color, 17” x 22” prints on 100-pound, satin-finish paper. Suitable for framing and all for just $29.95. Included in the set are posters inviting you to travel to historic Serenity Valley, tranquil Miranda, exciting Persephone, beautiful Sihnon and awe-inspiring Londinum. For more information, go to www.quantummechanix.com, or sign up for the QMx Insider newsletter at insider.quantummechanix.com.

Blue Sun Travel – We Bring the ‘Verse to You

SERENITY VALLEY: There is perhaps no place of greater significance in the ‘Verse than Serenity Valley, located on the planet Hera. It was here that all the worlds of the Alliance were finally united, ushering in an era of lasting peace and prosperity.

MIRANDA: Seeking rest and relaxation? Then beautiful Miranda is the place for you. Just a few days’ flight from the core, Miranda offers Alliance citizens the opportunity to truly get away from it all.

PERSEPHONE: Persephone is a planet like no other! It’s a one-stop shop for anyone wishing to experience all the wonders the ‘Verse has to offer. You can shop the vast array of exotic wares in Ginza, play all day and night in Gateway, or find transport to any place your traveling heart desires at the Eavesdown Docks.

LONDINUM: Londinum is the very heart of the United Alliance of Planets. Yet beyond simply being the center of the greatest government humanity has yet known, it is also a masterpiece of classical and modern architecture, recalling the former glory of Earth That Was while pointing a clear beacon skyward to our future of limitless potential.

SIHNON: Words don’t do justice to the beauty and mystery that awaits you on Sihnon. Home to the famous Companion Guild House, Sihnon is a beacon of civilization and a true wonder to behold.

Wow! Thank you, Mr Browncoat PDF! Why, that's a steal at only $29.95! And there are just 300 sets in the pre-release sale? I'd better get down to Comic-Con!

RAC: Official Whitefall Press Release

For those of you gorram no-good Yi Dwei Da Buen Chuo Roh who thought I was lying when I said that Whitefall had been acquired by QMx , I present you with this:


Yes, I know what he's working on for QMx.

No, I don't have any proof.... yet.

But I can tell you this much: you know how jaw-droppingly shiny the Serenity blueprints were?

This new project is better.

Bowel-looseningly better.

Hand to God.


Also, you can bid for a dinner with Joss on eBay.

RAC: Visit Tranquil Miranda, Marry Saffron, Don't Get Killed

Valiant members of my Radion Accelerator Corps brought me this information. (Fortunately, none of them are Bothans, and as such none of them died. Hmm, that gives me an idea...)

Not a joke! Not a hoax! Not prototype pieces you'll never get to own! This is real, folks!

This lovely poster, done in a style reminiscent of Chinese and Soviet Propaganda Art, was created by Adam Levermore-Rich (of Black Market Beagles fame) and is the second fan artist to be acquired by QMx! Hmmm... Blue Sun? Travel? I wonder if this could be the first of many...



Rumor has it that a prototype of one of Adam's first efforts on behalf of QMx will be quietly auctioned off at Saturday's Can't Stop The Serenity screening in San Francisco to raise money for Equality Now (Joss's favorite charity). And even if you can't make it to SF on Saturday, there are other Can't Stop the Serenity screenings in other parts of the world! Go here to find out if there's one near you. If so... GO!

Also, in related Firefly news, Chris Bridges from SerenityStuff.com has told me about his Sing a Song of Saffron contest that runs through the end of the month. If you're a Browncoat who's musically inclined, enter now for a chance win some nifty prizes! (Details and contest rules can be found at the website.)

Radion Accelerator Corps: the Evidence

It would appear that some of you doubt my credentials regarding my inside leaks at Quantum Mechanix, aka my Radion Accelerator Corps. Shame on you!

Normally, I'd just compose a vulgar sestina to mock you, but since Jericho has been renewed I'm feeling generous. Thus, I will show you doubting Thomases and Thomasinas photographic evidence of my credulity.

This is an uncut printer's sheet of the Serenity Money Pack. It's freaking HUGE.



EXTREME CLOSE-UP!!!! You can see the color-correction bars and the "money band".


I also have some other nice things as well, including some stuff I'm not allowed to talk about. But I can show you the following stuff.

Important: These are prototypes, not production design. I do not know when, or even if, these will become commercially available.

I now own stock in Tyrell Corp! (From Blade Runner)


Blade Runner money! (Note the date on the front:2017. Proof these aren't copies of real money from somewhere! They're authentically fake, folks!) Again, these are not slated for release.

Front:

Back:

And finally, this little beauty. It's made out of some kind of pressed tin or aluminum. If you think it looks familiar, you're right: Book, Jayne and Simon were using them as gambling tokens in Shindig. My source tells me this is a prayer card/ good luck amulet depicting Quan Yin, the Chinese Bodhisattva of Compassion. Once more, for the hat trick: as of yet there are no plans to produce this commercially.

Front:

Back:

There, now you have proof. Go forth in geekery, and sin no more.

(and no, you can't buy them off me. They're myyy precioussssssssssssssss.........)

Radion Accelerator Corps: Whitefall

All right, my little Browncoats, I've made you wait long enough.

Whitefall, the legendary artist who has created some of the most beloved Serenity-inspired derivative works, has been quietly recruited by Quantum Mechanix to help develop several new officially-licensed Serenity prop replicas. Expect an announcement to that effect in the none-too-distant future, along with details on the first prop to come from this collaboration.

"Lah dee dah," I hear you all saying. "Why should I give a feh feh pi goh about this?"

Here's why:

Here's a close-up of that upper-left corner:

Impressed? Whitefall made that. He's a fan who's crazy in love with Firefly/Serenity and makes awesome things like, say, Mal's Discharge Papers and Maps of Serenity Valley. You can find more his work here.

Now, if he can do incredible stuff like this on his own time, as a fan, can you imagine what kind of gao guhn he'll come up with now that he's working with QMx?

I cannot yet state with authority what he is working on-- deadlines are malleable things, and production delays occur -- but I assure you that it will be shiny.

The very femtosecond I know anything for certain, I will let you know.

Radion Accelerator Corps

You may not know it, but Auntie Palette is connected.

I have the inside dope on certain things. Certain very shiny things. I am the only outsider who knows them.

And if you are very, very good, I'll share my gao guhn information with you.

Some of you won't believe me at first. That's fine. When what I say starts coming true, I expect much bowing and scraping and begging forgiveness at my feet. Alternately, you may mollify me with offerings of plum wine and dark chocolate.

I have, among my legion of faithful readers (all one hundred of you -- I check my daily averages), at least one -- perhaps more (I am being vague to protect his/her/their identity) -- who work for Quantum Mechanix. I have dubbed this shadowy group my Radion Accelerator Corps, and if you don't get the pun you should be deeply ashamed of yourself.

"Mid-bulk Transport. Standard Radion Accelerator core. Class code 03-K64--Firefly." -- River Tam, "The Train Job"

Are you ready to hear what I know? Are you salivating yet? Crying to know more?

Mmm.... not today, I think. Perhaps tomorrow. I want you to be white-knuckled, ready to fall on your knees from anticipation.

EDIT: No, Firefly hasn't been picked up by another network. (I wish!) No, I mentioned Quantum Mechanix, and they make neat props and collectibles. That's what I have the scoop on.