Wednesday, August 14, 2013


Yes, you really need to imagine that title being said by Shang Tsung.

(As an aside, I really do adore the Mortal Kombat movie, cheese and all. As far as I'm concerned, it's the 90s version of Enter the Dragon.)

Anyway, I wanted to let y'all know that the initial barrage of gifts for Operation: Lymeparty has found its target:
I cannot tell you how unspeakably pleased I am that one of the first gifts to Squeaky was that parasol she wanted -- but she can, so let her tell you herself.

All right, now let's talk about Stretch Goals.  First off, I want to thank everyone who, through a combination of love, rhetoric, and violent screaming (much love to ya, Squeaky ;) told me in no uncertain terms that I was  off the hook for any and all pictures that made me uncomfortable. Sadly, this kind of cuts the knees off of Tiers 5 and 6, and I really don't know how to fix that. If anyone else wants to make suggestion, please go ahead.

Tier 1:  Fulfilled.

Tier 2:  There doesn't seem to be a consensus about what I should dramatically read. May I suggest my epic "Batman, as written by Chuck Palahniuk"?  I know I'm no Kevin Conroy, but on a really bad allergy day I'm sure I can be at least as scratchy as Christian Bale.

Tier 3:  Jennifer has taken over for Squeaky in lieu of S.W.'s bad health, but we are still having a heck of a time coming up with a good duet. I don't much want to be cast as "the guy," but that's what 90% of duets are. Blargh.

Tier 4:  "Gunnie Cosplay."  Right now, I've only heard three ideas that might be feasible:  Annie Oakley; some kind of "My Little Mosin,"  probably involving an ushanka and a greatcoat;  and a re-enactment of the profile picture I had before I replaced it with a pony version:

The middle one is probably the easiest to do, as I'm certain Oleg can get an ushanka and greatcoat.  Don't know about the costuming for Annie Oakley, and while we might get the costumes for Nerd Huntress, I worry (as is my nature) that my features will result in a VERY unappealing photograph.

Tier 5 has been removed from the table per Squeaky Wheel's request. I still feel bad about not fulfilling this. How about we wait until my big reveal September 1, and then you folks can make requests on this and Tier 6 after having seen my real face?

And that's about all I have right now...  please comment below, as I crave feedback.


  1. Wear the bikini on the outside of your clothes. Or get one of those long t-shirts that looks like you're wearing a bikini. Dramatically read a choose your own adventure, or any poem by Shel Silverstein.

  2. Jason (LaserJudas)August 14, 2013 at 4:56 PM

    I'm glad that Tier 5 has been removed, but not because I oppose it in any way. Rather, I think, in your willingness to go out of your way for a friend, you may have overextended what you might be comfortable in doing, even if that idea was in jest.

    I am happy that Squeaky cares enough about you to alleviate your stomach, as you clearly care enough about her to put your stomach's ease on the line.

  3. Yes, that's more or less exactly what happened, although tempered with "Surely this won't happen, but I need to give them encouragement to donate." It is rather awesome how folks just completely blew all my expectations away, though... ;)

  4. And since we've brought up Andrew Lloyd Webber


  6. If you are looking for a duet with two females, might I suggest Somewhere by Within Temptation. There is a duet version on YouTube that is fantastic.

  7. My vote for dramatic reading is either The Walrus and the Carpenter,(The Lewis Carroll poem), or something from Shakespeare (Something from Henry v or Hamlet for example).

  8. If you do that duet, I will do this song (as well as I can):


    Suggestion for Tier 6, but with smoking gun maybe?

  10. I've done that one. Might still have the sheet music around.

  11. I have that entire musical

  12. Sent you an email.

  13. mhm, persistant, too.

  14. akornzombie aka Chris StiversAugust 19, 2013 at 9:07 PM

    Idea for Tier 4: Cosplay as your pony pic


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